Discovering what love is one day at a time
Have you ever heard yourself say, “What’s the point? Why am I even here? Why do I even bother to pray?” There was a time in my life that those thoughts were spoken out quite often. But I believe that reaction came from my misunderstanding of God’s goodness, my own unbelief, pride, and a heart hurt from circumstances, and blinded by my unwillingness to surrender to Him. I also think that it can be pretty easy to remain in that place, if we base our faith on what we can see with our human eye.
The “why bother” attitude can be contrasted with “I haven’t arrived,” which recognizes we have been bought and paid for by a Holy God. Our sin is so dark in contrast to His holiness, we can see in our flesh that the work of Him transforming us into the image of His Son is a work in progress, and requires our active participation and partnership.
Interesting isn’t it that both attitudes have a strong conviction? The first attitude has placed confidence in self, (self-understanding), and the other has placed confidence in God Almighty. His Word tells us to not be conformed to the standards of this world but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds so that we can prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.
For we are the circumcision, who worship God in the Spirit, rejoice in Christ Jesus, and have no confidence in the flesh. Phil 3:3
We can build a fortress that surrounds us with our thoughts and our words. One of those fortresses is a deep pit, that we continue to dig on our own, burying ourselves in pain and woe. The other is a fortress that guards our minds and hearts, keeping us in His perfect peace while transforming, healing, and helping us to grow in His grace.
We can know which we are doing just by listening to the words that come out of our mouths.
Is my voice one of complaint and blame, or of gratitude and thanksgiving?
Is my confidence in my own understanding or do I rely on God and His Word?
Is my inner self full of anxiety and chaos, or do I have peace that surpasses understanding?
Which one have you set your mind to stay at? It is possible to remain in one place or the other. Because we do set our mind, our thoughts, our beliefs, convictions and our confidence up around us like a fortress that surrounds us on every side. The beauty of it is that we get to choose. We can choose. And the reality of it is that we can know what we have chosen by what’s happening on the inside when chaos surrounds us on the outside.
May all of our hearts be convicted by His goodness, grace and mercy, and may all of our confidence be in Him and Him alone. May He grant us, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with all might through His Spirit in the inner man, that Christ may dwell in our hearts through faith; that we being rooted in grounded in love may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and the length and the depth and the height- to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that we may be filled with all the fullness of God.
Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us. To Him be the glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations forever. Amen.
I have been married to my wonderful husband for 24 years. We have two young men ages 20 and 15.. This blog is somewhat of a journal and attempt for me to keep a purposeful perspective on life as a whole.