Discovering what love is one day at a time
When our littlest one was toddling around he loved to play in the Tupperware cupboard, and sit in the phone book drawer. He was a roly poly little guy, and had rubber band wrists and ankles. He actually bent the tracks on the drawer, and pulled the hinges out of the soft wood on the Tupperware cupboard. Also, he broke the frame of one of the doors. When he got into the drawer you could hear the hardware strain under his little pudgy body. The joy that came out of his mouth over his time in the drawer or giggling from inside the cupboard was worth the chaos that surrounded us. Tupperware was always strewn all over the floor, and the phone book and the hot pads were never in their proper spot. Helping our kids discover who they are is one of the joys of being their parents. Letting them explore and discover the world around them is messy and not always easy. Teaching them about God, as we are still learning ourselves makes life even more interesting. It is so amazing to me that He entrusts these children to our care…
Most often, there are not words to describe what my heart feels, what it is to know that I am loved by the King of Kings, the Creator of the Universe, and the amazement over the fact that He desires communication with me. He has transformed my life, and He continues to do so. He who began a work in me will continue, He won’t give up on me, even though in my finite ways I do give up from time to time.
It is all Him. He is so good. He is like liquid love. He pours in liquid fire, consuming those things that do not belong, yet a flame remains, that is Him. He never leaves. He is a joy uncontainable. I do not have words that give the Praise and Glory due His Name, words that can truly describe what is in my heart. He is hard not to talk about, because His Life in me has healed things I never thought were broken, and the things I knew that were. It’s difficult not to talk about the One I am consumed by. He is Wonderful, Amazing, Holy, Lovely.
Walking with Him is a continual discovery into the depths of His heart. Like the petals on a dahlia, His Word is full of so many thoughts of love toward us. Each word so full of depth and meaning, so complete, and yet developed more fully by the words surrounding, creating a beautiful picture of his perfect passion for us. Walking through His Word with Him, and discovering how deep it travels within. It is like the first time you discover reading, but better, because this is not a made up story, He actually has purpose for you in this life, and has plans to prosper you and not to harm you. The more you spend time with Him the more you cannot be without Him. Many try to say that He is like an addiction, yet an addiction is the opposite of His attraction. Addiction separates you from Him; His Spirit continually draws you into Him, and He brings life. His Word causes you to hunger and thirst for His presence, because He is in it. Truth brings freedom and light into the darkest places of your heart. The steps to freedom sometimes are very difficult and extremely painful, but it is so worth the journey there.
He is the friend, who tells you things you long to hear, but also the stuff you really would not like to see in your own heart, but you know He is absolutely right. When you truly do “hear” or “see” His words, you are broken over the fact that again you have failed this Friend that loves you anyway…deeper than any human can. And His love never changes. His love is so perfect, so pure, and so complete. In that love, He shows you that you have loved that thing more than Him, that you have loved something that is not just hurtful to you, but to others as well. You have loved sin. You have loved something that has kept you from experiencing more of Him. You were stuck, paralyzed, lame, stuck in your unbelief, loving Hell more than Heaven. You have chosen death instead of Life, the curse instead of the Blessing. You chose to listen to the liar, the destroyer, over the Way the Truth, and the Life. You chose allegiance to your enemy over your loving Father. But God. The dreadfulness of this reality is always redeemed. He shows us so that we can receive His grace even more. He is Restorer, Redeemer, Saviour. He is always able to save us from the uttermost darkness.
There is a song written by Mercy Me that echoes the cries of my heart and attempts to put words on the gratitude and thankfulness that overflows from my heart unto Him…
Who are we that You would be mindful of us what do You see that's worth looking our way we are
free in ways that we never should be sweet release from the grip of these chains like hinges
straining from the weight my heart no longer can keep from singing.
all that is within me cries for You alone be glorified Emmanuel God with us my heart sings a
brand new song the debt is paid these chains are gone Emmanuel God with us.
Lord You know our hearts don't deserve Your glory still You show a love we cannot afford like
hinges straining from the weight my heart no longer can keep from singing. [Back to chorus]
He fills my soul. I lack nothing simply because of Him.
“Lift up your heads, O you gates and be lifted up you everlasting doors! And the King of Glory shall come in.” Psalm 24:7
I have been married to my wonderful husband for 22 years. We have two boys ages 18 and 13.. This blog is somewhat of a journal and attempt for me to keep a purposeful perspective on life as a whole.