Together or Separate?

​Photo by Tim Marshall on Unsplash

I believe Henry Ford said this, “Coming together is a beginning, keeping together is progress, working together is success.”  

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“Behold how good and how pleasant it is for the brethren to dwell together in unity." Psalm 133:1 KJV

We can look at our world, our nation, our workplaces, our families and our churches, and we can see division.

We all are aware that two are better than one, and that we do better as a whole together.

Is our desire to be right more important than the hearts of those we disagree with? Is the topic more important than establishing, or deepening a relationship with another person?

Is the point of the conversation more important than the heart and spirit of the individual?

I try to spend as little time as possible listening to the news and using social media.  I now remember why. Since this pandemic began, however, I have had more time to scroll through both..

I find it difficult to listen to the polar opposites that you hear from the various news broadcasting “teams”.  I miss the news that we would watch when I was younger, where the facts were laid out without opinions, and we were left to think on our own without all the noise of opinion that both sides of the political spectrum now throw into the news arena.

I also find it heartbreaking to see the mirroring of this, coupled with the bullying that happens amongst all age groups on social media.  It reminds me of middle school, honestly.  A time where many youths choose to explore the landscape of no personal filter.

A place where the waterfall of words can become a discourse of disagreement, discouragement and bias. a place where the conversation is not a conversation at all it is simply two opposing views broadcasting their opinions without care or desire to understand the others point of view or even to take into consideration the other person’s experience. It seems like some of the social media platforms can be more of a creator of relationship barriers versus a relationship building platform.

Why is that?

How have we let it become this way?

Have we become insensitive to the need to honor and value others?

Is opinion valued more than relationship?  Why?

I am not saying that we need to not express where we stand on issues.  I am trying to express the fact that in our expression, we need to be sensitive to the viewpoints of others and ask more questions. The way in which we respond to another should be the way that we would want someone to respond to us.  We all are never going to agree completely. We may never completely understand the other’s point of view.  But seriously, is name calling getting anyone anywhere?

We are all simply people; beautifully different people, trying to make sense of this amazingly beautiful and complex world that we all live in and experience in so many ways.

What kind of experience will we all have when we listen, truly listen with our heart and spirit and hear in someone else’s understanding of it? 

Listening is not bowing to someone else’s understanding, or even agreeing with it.  But it is an opportunity to truly hear another's perspective and to look for common ground.

Contempt, scorn, and disdain are ugly ways to react to others. They automatically create walls and wounds.
And yet we can always choose to respond in another way. 

Love, honor and value are beautiful ways to respond to others.  They are catalysts that help to create pathways and encourage healing.

We get to decide, remembering that whatever worlds that we create with our words will be accounted to us.

How awful if we have become enemies to one another, vilifying one another.  This thought brings to memory a quote from C S Lewis, “the malice becomes wholly real and the benevolence imaginary.” 

This cannot be who we are, and this cannot be what we truly desire.